My tribe.
They say your vibe attracts your tribe. Like attracts like. I guess I’ve still got some work to do, because I don’t always see this.
Don’t get me wrong. I’ve got some kick-ass people in my life. There’s actually quite a few Jami-tribes around here. I’m good. I laugh. I smile. I belong. I’m surrounded by love.
But…
There’s those few. I might work on this the rest of my life and never truly understand how anyone can so easily walk away from love. Friend love. Romantic love. Family love. My love. Yes, I understand how our experiences affect how we respond to things. I get it.
But no, I don’t really get it. Despite shitty experiences or faulty conditioning or lack of emotional toolboxes, how fear can be so strong, miscommunication…I just don’t understand. Life is so fleeting. We get this one brief blip, one shot, and then we are gone.
Or maybe you are still here, but I’m gone.
I believe there will be regrets.
My attachments are fading. As much as I’ve been praying for this, part of me doesn’t want to lose them. I don’t want to get used to letting go of love so easily. I ache letting go of love. Love is a gift, a blessing… but I don’t think you realize this. Maybe like doesn’t really attract like, after all.
My tribe is strong. Solid. I’m good. But I’m holding space for you, just in case.
This post was written in response to Linda G Hill’s Stream of Social Consciousness Saturday, found at the link below. I’m grateful for the weekly writing nudge.
I know as we grow we have to let certain connections go.. its really hard for me too. I am a metal ox and I tend to try as hard as I can to make something work but sometimes I have held on too long and its just not flowing or working.. .I think once we do let go new energy can come in to that space..
Yes, I know you are right. And this is what I work towards. I truly have learned and believe that not everyone is meant to stay in your life forever. And I have been graced with the ability to love them for the roles they played in my journey.
But still…
I know… I get it, it can be darned painful…:(
“I get it.
But no, I don’t really get it.”
I can sure relate to that and so much of these words from your heart. It makes me think of my daughter who is in her mid-twenties. She’s become distant though we’re in the same city. I get it that she needs her own space and her own life. My head gets that, but my heart, not so much. Maybe she’ll come close again like her older brother did, maybe not. Even though we let go, there will always be space for those we’ve loved.
When you heal attachment, rather than force it upon yourself, letting go of relationships (or things) that no longer serve you well, people who no longer operate where you are, becomes natural and easy. And the truth is, letting go of the need or want means more love and peace comes to you. You can always hold someone in your heart with loving intention, while no longer having a relationship with them.
Keep going!
I had an epiphany last summer when something shifted inside me and I finally no longer wanted what I never had in one relationship. I saw the whole thing through different eyes. Part of me had kept up the hope that this person would change and be the person they were supposed to be (loving, nurturing, caring). That little girl deep inside finally let go. Matrix Energetics is awesome for this sort of healing.
I have a sister like friend who I hadn’t seen in years. We ran into each other at the mall over year ago. We stood there talking for over an hour and a half. I thought we would probably connect again shortly but as I may have mentioned it’s been over a year. I don’t have it in me to reach out. My tribe consists of who is right in front of my face. Sad but true.