Self Care…It’s All or Nothing

It’s all or nothing. That’s how things seem to be going around here. Just two months ago, I had nothing to write about. I had a lot of time on my hands. Things were peaceful in my soul. Then, life happened. My stepfather died last week. Yesterday, I found my mom on the floor of her living room. After spending the day in the ER, I took her home with me, nursing her vertigo and nausea. Caregiver stress is real, people. Be careful. My dryer vent must be clogged, because it smells like burned rubber when it’s running. I’m sure I can take the vent apart and clean it, but just haven’t had the time or energy, between caring for my mom and driving the boys around. I finally wrote my stepfather’s obituary last night, and ordered his funeral cards this evening. I’ve made his funeral arrangements. I need new tires on my car, but have to work all week, so not sure when I’m going to get them put on. I’m tired.

Sounds overwhelming, doesn’t it? Well, believe it or not…it isn’t. My soul is still at peace. How? I can’t say for sure, but I’d like to think it’s from my “practice”.  I’ve been committed to my mediation practice, to therapy, to eating healthier, to Reiki, to enjoying purposeful interactions with my loving and nurturing friends, to learning how to play my drums, to prayer… all the things I do to nurture and love myself. My yoga teacher always tells us we can’t keep pouring water out for everyone else in our lives if we don’t refill the pitcher… meaning, if you give all your love and energy away, it will run out. So, I do these things to fill my pitcher up. This allowed me to care for my stepfather, to care for my mother, to care for my children, to care for my patients…because I care for myself right along with them. I fully commit to my practice, because I want to be the best caregiver I can for those I love. I don’t want to care for them just a little bit, so I don’t let me care for myself just a little bit. Self care… it’s all or nothing. It doesn’t fix everything, but it fixes enough. Give it a try… a peaceful soul is definitely as good as it sounds…



The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS May 20/17



20 thoughts on “Self Care…It’s All or Nothing”

  1. I hope you realize the wisdom you have found that so many people are still clueless about. Everything about our lives begins with ourselves. Everything. Our happiness, our peace, our misery, our stress. It all begins and springs forth from our own hearts. I am impressed by you, my dear. Self care is critical to well being and internal peace, and you are doing it.

    1. Thank you, Susan. I did spend SO much time looking for it elsewhere, when it was within me the whole time. I think that’s just part of the process. You can’t appreciate what’s in front of you till you go through the process of searching for it, and come up empty.

  2. You are doing so well, though I am sure you feel tired, but that will pass in time. Its such a testament to the work you have done on yourself that you are thriving now. despite the challenges. Very inspiring to read. Sending you positive thoughts and energy. 🙂 <3

    1. Thanks, Deborah. It really is amazing that I can have this relationship with my mom now. I’m so grateful I did the work on myself when I did, so I could finally let go of my resentment and be here for her now 🙂

  3. You are so right. I’m very sorry to hear about your losing your step father. Sending the best thoughts for your Mom’s healing. Take care and keep caring for you too. Hugs.

  4. I’m glad you’re feeling at peace, even in the middle of the busyness and difficult circumstances. It’ so true that we need to look after ourselves if we want to be able to have anything useful to offer to anyone else.

    1. Thank you. I think we are finally rounding the corner on the busyness, at least for now. I was able to go to church, go to therapy and go to meditation this week, so that should cover my self-love for now:)

  5. I wish you could do some Reiki on me! I haven’t had it in so long!
    I’m so glad you feel peaceful and not depleted.
    About the dryer vent. Do you have a blower? Once a year we have to hook up a blower and take off that tube on the back and literally blow out the entire vent until it puffs out lint all outside. Just a thought.

  6. You have found your secret to balancing the stress we deal with every day and this makes very happy to hear. Although I am very sorry for all the hardship in your life lately. You are conquering beautifully my friend. Hugs

  7. Glad to hear you’re keeping it together, Jami. For me, it’s self-awareness and living in the moment that gets me through. I wish I had time to meditate, but I just don’t. And it takes practice – I’ve been good at it in the past.
    So I do what I can, appreciate the good things, knowing they won’t last, and try not to give in to caregiver stress!! 😛

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